| What's new? |
[25 Oct 2007|09:38am] |
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MC Chris-Geek |
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So life has been a little out of the ordinary lately. I just spent 20 minutes trying to figure out what my current livejournal user name was. I don't understand people most of the time. Is it really that hurtful when I say I don't have time to hang out? Half the time I have nothing to do but hang out, and the few weeks that I'm busy I suddenly become the worst friend ever and people stop talking to me? Boys are stupid. Well, anyway, off to work... again. But I hope you're all doing wonderful.
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| Big in Japan |
[18 Aug 2007|10:46am] |
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mood |
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loose cannons - new york city girls |
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So, I haven't been back a month yet and I'm already fucking up. I'm just so talented. Oh well, replace what you can't fix, right? Anyway, I have my heart set on Boston, so that is what will happen. But if there is anyone sitting there reading this thinking "How I would love to drive 23 hours and 7 minutes in a tiny little car that looks like a lime to see a horrible rap duo!" Please feel free to give me a call because I can make your dreams come true.
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| AHHH! |
[08 Aug 2007|07:33am] |
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Stop just showing up places that you're not invited to. I don't need a stalker.
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| August 6th! |
[16 Jul 2007|11:42am] |
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mood |
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 content |
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On this very date Rich Cronin and his manband co stars will grace our televisions with their old has been faces. Such beautiful faces. Or at least one. And in one month I will be venturing back to South FL. This trip was good. Ms. Helen is out of the hospital and she says she's feeling better. I bought a cute little blue tube top at Old Navy and I am very fond of it. I slept until almost 10 this morning! I did wake up a few times but not officially until then. I saw half of Harry Potter this weekend and eventually I think I would like to see the whole thing. There is a whole list of movies I want to see right now. And on Wednesday I'm getting my eyeballs checked. Hope you're all having good times.
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| I know a lot of these posts are angry but... |
[29 Jun 2007|12:06pm] |
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scrubs |
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You are the one that decided to act like a little kid. Now that you miss me, you want to talk. Well, I don't. And I am never going to. You had your chance to be friends with me and you took it and ruined it. Now that you have pissed off all of your friends I will not be your last resort. Not now, not in the future. So grow up and leave me alone. I don't care what you are doing now with school and I won't care later so just leave it. I'm not mad at you. I got over it. You should too, so open up your myspace page and make yourself some new friends.
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| its been a while |
[10 Jun 2007|08:37pm] |
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I know I have not been here in a while, but I felt like I should update since everything that is going on is so... strange. I just want everyone to know I'm still alive. And that it wouldn't hurt to call every once in a while.
Love, Katie
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| :( |
[16 Jan 2007|07:35am] |
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Brand New |
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I woke up this morning wanting to cry. My mother thinks I'm depressed and I'm starting to believe it. I never relate to song lyrics and when people do I feel sorry for them because the songs are usually depressing, but I'm sitting here listening to Brand New - Mix Tape and I agree completely. "When I say lets keep in touch, I really mean I wish that you'd grow up." That's exactly how I feel and it sucks even more to know it will never happen no matter how hard I wish. My kidneys are killing me but I think I'm going to try to go back to work since sitting here alone all day would just be too much. And I was just thinking about something funny, if I drank anything, I would stay drunk for days since my body can't process it. It's starting to sound appealing. Heh. I'm just kidding. Drinking is bad. Don't do it. Maybe all this shit will start to get better soon. I'm just dying for it too! And I'm sure Katie is waiting for it all to be over so I'll start hanging out with someone else. I'm really sorry, but I do need you. I think I might try to go to dance tonight. That will be my goal for the day. Lets hope its a good one for everyone.
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| its sunday :( |
[14 Jan 2007|07:00am] |
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mood |
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crappy |
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Sometimes, getting up so early is the breaking point of the whole day. There is no one awake so it gives me time to think about things that I don't need to be thinking about. It gives me time to plan out things that I shouldn't be doing. And by the time that everyone else gets up, I've already had a shitty day. It's not fair to myself, much less anyone around me. I think I'll have to start waking up at 3 am to take a sleeping pill so I can sleep all day and have everyone awake once I wake up. I hate the weekends because on a weekday I only have to sit here a few hours and then I can go to work. But not on Sunday. I sit here a few hours and then I sit here a few more. I know it sounds like I'm complaining all the time, but I don't mean to. There isn't anything for anyone else to do about these things, it's all me. All of my feeling about all of this mess I'm in right now have somewhat gone away, but there is still that little part of me that wants to go break down his door and make everything go back to the way it was before. I suck.
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| you dont have to read this if you dont want to |
[09 Jan 2007|03:31pm] |
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the fan |
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From this point on I will not dwell on anything in my past. I will not get upset over things I can not change. I will learn to move on and deal with my emotions in a healthy way. I will set goals, focus on them, and reach them. I will forgive myself for allowing other people to hurt me. I will forgive others that have hurt me. I will hold no anger and I will let go of all feelings of any sort I had for any of these people. Even though I let others treat me in unkind ways, it does not mean that I deserve this. I am still a great person with a charming personality and if this is not what you see when you look at me, please turn away. When I have problems, I need to talk them out. When I get hurt, I need to talk about it with the person who hurt me. If I can't do this I don't know how to deal with the emotional part of it and I become very stressed and I cause myself to get sick. I will never do this again. I will not allow myself to become a part of an unhealthy relationship again. If you don't want to love me, you don't have to. I will never go through any of this again with anyone. I will find a boyfriend that loves me for me and that will treat me the way I deserve to be treated. If this can not happen, then I will not date anyone. At all. I will not look for anyone in an unnatural place. If I happen to meet someone, good, but I will not search. Anything good that happens to me I will be thankful for. Anything bad that happens to me must have happened for a reason and I need to learn to accept that. I will focus on me from now on. I will put myself as my first priority, my education as my second, friends as my third, and anything after that will have to wait. I want to be a chiropractor and I do not want anyone in my life that will hold me back for any reason. I can make something of myself regaurdless of everything that has happened to me over the years. I won't allow myself to get depressed or over stressed. I am going to make a schedule to follow from now on. My days will be planned out. I need more structure in my life. I will appreciate the time that I have alone. Who needs to rush into marriage anyway? I will socialize as much as I can when I'm still young, because once I move to Atlanta all of my time will need to be given to my school work. I will work on getting over the fears of being alone, failing, meeting new people, and any other fear that I have or that I may develop. I will try to be more helpful. I will try to give others second chances. I will appologize for things that are my fault. I will not take responsibility for things that are not. I will be somewhere with other people for at least a half an hour everyday whether it be at the gym, at a club, or at a party. Next week I will write Lance a letter telling him how I feel and giving him the option to be friends. I will take it by his house and then I will let go. I hope. From this moment on, I will focus all my energy on correcting the parts of my life that I have screwed up. I'm going to let myself know how much I love and accept myself. If I ever did anything to you I'm truely sorry and I hope you can forgive me. I will also try to be more availible to anyone that needs me. I know I'm not the best with that and I'm sorry. I may need some support on this, so bring on the encouragement.
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| I'm stoned! |
[07 Jan 2007|10:04am] |
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That's not true, I am not stoned, but I have kidney stones.
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| Bad Week |
[06 Jan 2007|12:01pm] |
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It has been a long time, but I am having a bad week. I broke up with Lance, again. This will probably be for good this time. Needless to say, I moved out. I was in the hospital yesterday. I am still sick. They don't know what is wrong with my, but my white cell count is high so there is obviously an infection somewhere. I'm going to see Dr. Corey later today, so hopefully that will help. If you can make my day any better, please go ahead.
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| AHH! |
[22 Sep 2006|08:56pm] |
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I want everyone who knows me to be aware that you will might die. Someone ELSE I know died. I'm getting really sick of this. He wasn't my best friend or anything, but I did know him and I was friends with his sister a few years ago. So, for those of you who pray, keep Michael Grimme's family in your prayers.
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| Theme Parks |
[12 Sep 2006|01:58pm] |
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On Saturday Lance and I went to Lion Country Safari and saw all the animals, but that wasn't enough, so we went to Orlando! On Sunday we went to Sea World and as we were leaving we got lost, so we stayed another day and on Monday we went to Magic Kingdom. Out of all of that, Magic Kingdom was by far the best. There was this little kid in front of us on this one ride and he was crying and saying "Mommy, I don't like this ride. Stop it, I want to get off." It was very funny. I was disappointed in Sea World. I went all the way there just to see Shampoo and the whale show sucked! It was the little kid that was in Free Willy (now he's a trainer) giving this motivational talk to this little kid that wants to be a whale trainer and telling him to beleieve and all this other stuff. And someone hit my car in the parking lot at work and now I'm missing a tale light. I think we're gonna trade in the Miata for a not so small, not so convertable car. After the light gets fixed, of course.
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| I'm sorry |
[04 Sep 2006|10:15pm] |
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i dont deserve any! |
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This is my formal appology for taking part in the killing of Steve Irwin. I really never had any intention of this. Sitting in our St. Augustine hotel room and watching the Crocodile Hunter, I said to Lance "I'm suprised he's still alive." I was talking about all the animals he's come across in his life, then I rolled over and went to sleep. I wake up this morning and sure enough, I killed him. I hope the world can forgive me.
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| This has nothing to do with Panic at the Disco!!! |
[25 Jul 2006|07:53pm] |
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ben folds |
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I've always been really into history and diseases and stuff, but lately the curiosity has gotten so intense that I want to unapply to chiropractic school and go to medical school instead so I can spend every day in a hospital. I know it's weird but I'm just drawn to all the mysteries of hospitals. Sick people go there every day. People are born there. People die there. People who go there get what ever sickness someone else has there. I really do find it interesting. Especially like an old civil war hospital or something. I don't really care to see people in pain or see people die or anything but maybe I could work the night shift and talk to crazy ghosts. Even when I am in the hospital I want to turn off all the lights and walk around. Not that I'd be able to do that due to the lovely IV that needs to be plugged in all the time and the pediatric area is always watched really carefully. Is this weird?
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| odd? |
[05 Jul 2006|09:58pm] |
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joe wilson |
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So Terry wants to buy me a new cell phone and a car. The car for my birthday so it can be in my name, but still. He's not related and hasn't known me for too long. This is getting weird. And I think Daniel is getting jealous. I have to be honest tho, I'm loving it.
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[28 Jun 2006|10:37pm] |
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So tonight was Terry's birthday so I went to his house. He bought a scooter and I scooted. He let me drive his car. He told me that he was sorry I didn't marry Lance. Lance is marrying an amish girl. We went to a Benihana-ish place for dinner. It was good. I love being treated like I'm royalty. Now I'm just waiting for Daniel to call. I feel bad for keep hanging up on him. I don't know how I feel about Katie being his number 2 tho.
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| SO TIRED!!! |
[10 Jun 2006|08:47pm] |
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nada |
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I drove all night and babysat all day, but I'm happy. Atlanta is some place that I can see myself living. The people at Life are the people that I need to be around. They are who I want to be. I'm very excited. I don't know how well I'll get along without my friends, but educationally, I don't think it could get much better. I honestly hate to leave this so much, and I don't know if it's the right thing to do. I have so many people depending on me. Especially Ms. Helen. I worry about her. But you never know what can happen in a year. Who would have thought that I would be going to a private out of state school? The way things work out are so crazy. I hope that I'll be able to handle everything and still keep in contact with the people that I like. I don't care if the people that annoy me never call, but I don't want to lose my friends. California is on Tuesday. I'm not packed. I'm not ready. Not even close. I don't know who decided that I belonged on stage or that I had any amount of talent, but I'm sure it wasn't me. I hope no one shows up to the farewell concert. That'll be a sight.
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| I'm trying to write in this often |
[06 Jun 2006|11:23pm] |
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JM - rescued |
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I just made the mistake of looking at 's myspace. I missed you then, I miss you now, I'll probably miss you forever. I miss Katie. I didn't realize how much time I actually spent with her. It's pretty lonely in the 'hood without her here. Thursday I leave for Atlanta and Monday I leave for California. And then June 25th, Andrea and I are leaving from the airport to go up to Orlando so we won't have to miss Warped Tour. It's going to be a busy summer. Still haven't gotten much more school work done. I wish I could be more expressive. I wish I could open up more. I wish I knew how to talk to people. Or had the guts. Well, there isn't much left. I'd do just about anything to talk to Casey right now. It's hard having online friends. They're just not always around. I need some real friends. One day, I guess.
Oh! Oh! I almost forgot. I kept getting calls from blocked numbers today saying that they were from Y-100 and they were giving away something and to call this number at 8am tomorrow and I was like go away and they kept calling back so eventually, I decided it must be David Melillo since he's the only person that prank calls me. After Andrea is done using her obscene language and they stop calling back, I get in my car and I'm listening to the radio and the dj says something about calling the number tomorrow to win or whatever. Haha. Andrea cursed out a radio personality.
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| This nights a prefect shade of dark blue |
[03 Jun 2006|11:51pm] |
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Well, it was while I was outside looking at it. Tonight I did something that I have been looking forward to for years. It was every bit as good as I remember it. Maybe even better. No matter how much I say that I don't like being outside, standing with friends, listening to loud music, or singing along... I'm lying. I was impressed tonight and if you know me, you know it doesn't happen too much. I'm sorry you missed it.
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